I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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