I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
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