they said they heard you say put it in my butt
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
