I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
