I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I lost the right to judge tonight
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
