So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
