By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
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