i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
