did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
