..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
Randomize
