I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Randomize
