i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
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