apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
