I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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