He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
