If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Randomize
