if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
