I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
