He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I'm surprised, it's been so long you must be starving
At a certain point, the zombie-like hunger goes away. Then the sadness sets in. Then you start lying to yourself that you're taking some "me time." Then you remember you dodged chlamydia and Buddha knows what else. Then you're at peace with it.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
