The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Randomize