Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
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