But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
