What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
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