we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
