I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
