Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
Fuck appropriateness.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
Randomize
