Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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