You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
