I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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