This is not my ceiling
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
Randomize