My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
