So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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