I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Bang-toberfest begins!!
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
