she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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