you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
