i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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