everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Randomize
