we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
