i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
