Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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