I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
