just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
