he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize