is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
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