so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I thought my dog was a polar bear. I kept asking how the north pole was this time of year.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
