I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
