Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize