THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
