You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Randomize
