i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Oh god it's open bar.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
