My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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